Year End, New Blog

Busy Busy. That's the norm. I can't believe this year (2014) is basically over. 

I've been soo blessed to have had so many opportunities to grow my trust in God. This year I:

• Coached Middle-school basketball
• Resigned from school
• Ran a half-marathon
• Moved to Philadelphia
• Turned 26
• Sold my car
• Nanny-ed in THE SAME house I nanny-ed in 2 years ago (631 Pine St)
• Accepted a FULL TIME teaching position
• LAUNCHED The Block church
• Began attending counseling

I wouldn't have wanted to do this year any other way. There have been lots of laughs, lots of tears, and lots of opportunities to grow in my faith. God has been SO present in every step that I've taken this year and I can't wait to see what He has for me in 2015. I've been meditating and praying and I feel that 2015 is going to be my Year of Going Deeper. I want to grow deeper in my knowledge of the Bible and deeper in my personal relationship with Christ. I'll seek out more spiritual gifts. Ask for wisdom and understanding and believe for breakthrough for my city: Philadelphia. The Ocean was created by God, controlled by Moses and Elijah, and walked on by Jesus. Let's see what the vast "ocean" of God's word has for me!

I'm toying with the idea of eliminating my usage of Facebook for 2015, but I'm not sure if i'm ready to do that yet. I'm going to start with the first 21 days of 2015. I might be back on facebook after that; I might not. 

So if you want to know what I've been up to, my new blog is where it's at. DeeperFaithForCherith.blogspot.com Happy 2015! -Cherith

Look at me now

If someone told me I'd be less stressed out now than I was a month ago I'd tell them they were right. Getting into a new routine is hard; but worth it. 

I am so honored to be a small part of two incredible things that are going on in the wonderful city of brotherly love. Firstly the Block Church. I moved here to help launch TBC and God has shown me incredible provision in return for my trust on Him. The Block has become the big family I always wanted. It's become my safe place where I can go and just be myself. It's the home of the love of my life. My Lord and savior Jesus Christ. Everything else is garbage when compared to the significance of having a relationship with my King. 

In addition to serving with The Block, I have been blessed with the opportunity to teach middle school math and Bible in North Philly. HPCA has proven itself far beyond my greatest expectations. The kids are incredible, the staff is gracious, and the administration is trusting and supportive. I'm soo blessed to be able to be a part of their team. 

I knew that this year was going to be a year where I TRULY needed to trust God. Trust is hard. Trust can be blind. But trusting in God doesn't go Un-rewarded. There are still things God asks me to do that are far beyond my comfort zone and additionally aren't even things I can accomplish on my own. But HE strengthens me. HE gives me self control. And best of all HE loves me no matter what. 

If you ever read these blogs posts and want to know more about our awesome creator who loves us and wants to be in relationship with us: please message me! I would love to tell you more about how truly amazing our perfect, loving God truly is.

I just really want a Chai Tea.

Matthew 6 talks about fasting in private so as not to boast about what you are doing. I get what he's saying here, but let me tell you, having accountability during a fast is huge for me.

Our lead pastor, Joey, began a 3-part fast on August 1st. He, and anyone who wanted to join him, is fasting all media for 10 days, then doing a Daniel fast (as done by Daniel in the Bible). The Daniel fast limits what you can eat to the basic principle of: only natural things that come from the earth. So fruit, veggies, beans, whole grain, etc. The last 10 days of Joey's fast will be pure liquids.

I've mixed my order up since I'm going to be traveling next week and I couldn't fathom trying to maneuver a food-based fast while I was on vacation, however I will be fasting Social Media for those 10 days of August 10-20. It will be difficult, but I hope to read many books during that time period.

So I'm currently trying to uphold a Daniel Fast. Man do I miss cheese. And milk. And chocolate. And COFFEE. Definitely coffee. I'm only on day 4 and I feel stretched. Perhaps it's because the weight of learning how to be a good and effective Admin for The Block Church happened to really hit hard today, or perhaps this is just part of the growing process. I once heard it said that the workout never gets easier, you just get stronger. I'm not sure that church planting will ever get easier, but by the grace of God, I will get stronger. Through long hours and tough roads, it will be worth it.

At some point I probably should start lesson-planning, but right now, I've got other things to do, and I believe that God will give me the focus and understanding that I'll need once the time to ACTUALLY lesson plan rolls around. Oh, say, tomorrow.

I hope to look back on this blog come January 2015 and rejoice in the triumph that God is going to bring through this process and be glorified through me.

Halfway there, forever to go

Back in December 2013 I was toying with the idea of moving to Philly to help launch this church. I had lived in Philly before and I knew I loved it here; but I also loved Ann Arbor. Although I was nowhere near ready to admit that I needed to make the move, I was ready to name my year and I felt that 2014 was going to require me to trust God   

Remember that law of gravity, what goes up must come down? Well the 2 years I spent in A2 were pretty smooth sailing. I felt closer to God than I ever had in my entire life and I was continually growing in my faith and character.

 I knew that there was going to be some major change in 2014 and that the only way I was going to get through alive (both spiritually and mentally) was through my trust in God. My trust that He is Good and He has good things for me. That He is Loving and full of Mercy when I fail. But here I find myself in August and I still struggle to find that trust, especially in certain areas of my life. I am praying this week that the Holy Spirit would begin to groom me of the lies I believe about myself. I know that I am the daughter of the King of Creation, I just need to believe that I am special. As I begin to grow in the trust that He created me to be special, I believe that the opportunities I will embrace will grow exponentially. I will find my hope and confidence in He who made me and sent His son to die for me. That is something I can trust in. 

Distractions

What happens when you try to plant a church? God moves mountains that's what. In the past few weeks our church has been able to secure a venue to hold our Sunday morning service! It's a wedding catering hall in the Port Richmond neighborhood of Philadelphia, PA. It's soo nice to have a place to invite people to. It was difficult to tell people about a church that didn't "exist" yet at a location that hadn't been determined yet.

Other good has come my way. I have accepted a teaching position at Hunting Park Christian Academy. I will be teaching Middle School Math and Bible. That's 6th-8th grade. It is a full-time position with benefits. I am truly blessed. Back in January, before I had decided to listen to God an commit to moving to Philadelphia, I looked into Christian schools in the Philly area. I came across HPCA at that time and saw that they had a 5th grade vacancy posted. I e-mailed the principal but never heard back. Fast forward nearly 4 full months later, on a day that I was praying to God about future jobs and FINALLY giving that control over to him, I heard back from HPCA. They wanted to interview me.

In spite of being so clearly blessed and provided for, my flesh longed for something more: companionship. I neither dated nor pursued anyone while I was in Ann Arbor. Sure I had a crush here and there, but all short-lived. When I moved back to Philly, I started dating again. I enjoyed the thrill of the pursuit and the hope of a future spouse. I quickly became super distracted by this. I idolized my phone and use every opportunity possible to check my messages and emails to see if I had any new contacts from the online dating site I was using. My work with the church became my second priority, and God became my third. I worked on my church responsibilities with a half-focused, half-passion.

I've always been one to keep busy so that I don't feel lonely. I need to dismantle the distractions and direct my focus to God and God alone. He is the one who brought me here, He is the one who created me and ordered my steps, and He is the one who is leading me in the path that I should go. No more detours. They are a perfectly painful path laid out by the master schemer, Satan himself. Course we never know the damage that is done until it hits us smack in the face and the wound is created. It's not worth it. As nice as those distractions are, they are temporary and I can't, and won't, allow a temporary trick to interpolate my journey to an infinite destination.

This day, July 23rd, 2014 is the day that I step forward with my hands open wide, stretched toward the creator of my destiny. I will clench control no longer. Bring on the wild ride of His all-powerful, all-inspiring, perfect plan.

Prospective Jobs

Well I've been here a few weeks and it's nice to be in the swing of things. I picked up a part-time nanny job, something I hadn't necessarily anticipated, but it's going ok. I'm actually working in the EXACT SAME house that I nannied in when I lived here before. Crazy right? It was a rough first few days, but the little boy (age 3.5) is finally starting to trust me and let his guard down a little bit. Still lots of tears when I ask him to do something he doesn't want to do. 

The anxiety of my future job has been weighing heavy on my heart. I'm not going to be able to teach at a public or charter school this fall; at least not one that's strict about certification. Turns out that PA teacher certification is VERY difficult to get. They have been dissecting my transcripts and found that there are 3 specific classes that I never took in either of my programs. They are requiring me to take these classes in order to get a teaching license here. It's a pain. 

Thankfully I can take the classes at the local community college for about $450 per class... I just have to wait until I've been a Philly resident for a year before I can get those cheap resident rates. Clearly my patience is being challenged but in the healthiest way possible. I'm always trying to make the hard times fly by, rather than enjoy the journey and embrace the process. 

The Christian school I interviewed at wants to do a second interview, but at a low salary, I'd have to take on a second job, something I don't want to do while I'm working on this church plant. It would just take too much time and energy. 

I need to pray and fast about it so that I can stop trying to control the situation and trust that God is going to provide for me with HIS perfect plan. #growingPains. 

Deja Vu

Well seems as though I have a reoccurring case of déjà vu. It feels as though I never left Philly. I'm actually nannying part time in the VERY SAME house I nannied in 2 years ago. The family that lives there needed care in the afternoons for their 3.5 year old son. 

I'm loving falling back into the routine of life here. I didn't realize how much I missed it. 

My Sebring

Well I made it to Philly safe and sound. Unfortunately, my car is still having issues. Before leaving A2 my mechanic removed my brake shoes (part of the emergency break) because they were rubbing. Turns out the whole "backing plate" is rusted out and needs to be replaced. I find this frustrating as I am trying to sell my car, and I need it to be ready to pass PA inspection when I sell it. 

Why do I want to sell my car? Well I've come to the conclusion/decision/revelation that I need to. You see, I bought that car 6 years ago right about the time I decided that I was going to do life on my own how I best saw fit. It was at that point that I started to live in moral decay and corroded my life with endless bad choices. That car transported me all over the east coast. Some trips innocent, others intentional. I don't doubt that God provided that car for me, but I believe that selling it is, in a way, me letting go of my previous life. 

See when I was driving out here, I was pondering ALL of the things that have gone wrong in my car, and in some way they all seem to correlate to my journey and the story of Jonah that keeps being reaffirmed in my life. First, the timing-belt tensioner and water pump went. For those of you who don't speak car, that's $1500 of parts and labor for the engine parts that control the timing of movement and the amount of water that is used to cool the engine (or something like that). Jonah was asked to give a message in God's TIMING and he ended up in the WATER on his journey to Tarsus.  Additionally, my emergency brake broke. The final saving grace to keep a vehicle from moving when you want it to stay still, broke. To me this is symbolic of my desire to grit my teeth and fight changes in movement that God might ask of me. If my emergency brake doesn't keep me in place, I am free to go where He leads me. 

Anyways, as I was driving here, I realized something profound: I drive a SEBRING. Sea-bring. The sea brought Jonah to Ninevah. And my car has brought me on endless journeys. Now that I embark on this journey, I find it important to sell my "boat" so that I no longer have a way to run away from God and the challenges that He will call me to as I work here and plant this church. Just as Paul did in Acts 16, I think I need to walk a little. Grow some calluses as I sink my anchor into this city and love it the way God loved Ninevah: with fierce ambition and unfailing love. 

Good Bye Gifts

Today I was blessed with a party after school that was put on by my fellow elementary colleagues. I'm truly blessed to have worked with some amazing and supportive teachers this year! My first year of teaching stretched me in countless ways and I'm so thankful to have grown with these women. 

They gave me a few gifts but this one was my favorite. 

It is signed by all of my students. I will cherish it forever. 

This is what the front looks like. 

Only 5 more days til I move. Say a prayer for my car as it has something wrong with it... Again. 

The kids know

On Friday I had the chance to speak in chapel. I spoke about Jonah and how God gave him mercy (our theme of the month). I then vaguely told the kids of how God asked me to do something that I didn't want to do and that after hearing the story of Jonah several times that week, I knew that I had to obey. 

I've been able to talk to them a little bit about it. Today was hectic as I had an afternoon field trip with the 4th graders. 

I've got my kitchen just about all packed up. Everything is already so empty that it doesn't even feel like my apartment anymore.... Which is good for the grieving I guess. 

At this point I'm just looking forward to being in Philly and getting some much needed REST. 

The Last Time

As time draws my move nearer, I'm finding more and more that I'm telling myself: "This is the last time I will be....." and then I fill in the blank. Every time I do it it breaks my heart a little bit. Saying goodbye is going to be hard. To be honest, which I usually try to be, I think the hardest part about moving is knowing how difficult it is going to be to stay in touch with the people here in Michigan.

It's very easy for me to immerse myself 100% into what I am doing, so once I have arrived in Philly I know that I will be getting extremely busy with The Block Church.

As I move towards this next step I am praying for peaceful sleep. I have been havin VERY vivid dreams and they leave me feeling drained when I wake up. As exciting as it might seem to watch a suspense thriller every night, waking up from one every morning isn't exactly appealing.

This week I am also praying for patience with my students. Some of the girls have been quite standoffish. I'm most certain that they know that I'm moving and they don't seem to be processing it well.

Provision

It's often extremely difficult to trust God in the current situation you may be facing. Trusting that your past was a journey to bring you to the present is pretty easy to see. Trusting that the future will ultimately lead you to eternity with Him is relatively easy to do. But trusting God in the present, well right now that seems pretty difficult. 

I've really started to grieve the moving process. My heart is broken to know that after I leave, people here will continue on with their lives with little or no real sense of the presence I was in their life; or could have been. All this time my presence here has been merely temporary... and I knew that, but it doesn't make it any easier. 

For tonight, and most likely many nights to come, I'll let tears rent my eyes and I'll embrace the true loss that I feel in this. But I am more than a conqueror and through Christ I can be courageous. I'm so thankful for those who support me and pray for me. But for the time being, please don't hug me unless you plan to let me cry on your shoulder. 

My Jonah Moment(s)

    During the second week of February my second grade class was finishing up their unit on animal habitats. We were studying the ocean habitat and specifically just how great the ocean is. That Friday, Valentine's Day, I decided to tie my chapel sermon, if you can even call it that, to my lessons on the ocean habitat. I spoke about Jonah, and how God loved him so much, that he gave him a second chance in regards to Nineveh and the mission God had called him to there. I explained that God's love is greater than that of the ocean and that sometimes God offers us the opportunity for a second chance....

That very evening I hopped a plane to Philadelphia. A couple friends of mine were teaming up in Philly to launch a church and they had asked me to consider being part of the core leadership team. To be honest, I told them no. I love the life I have here in Ann Arbor and full-time ministry was not something I was interested in. Nevertheless, I headed to Philly to seek God and see if what they had going on was something I wanted to be a part of. I was already feeling a bit like a Jonah, like God had asked me to do something I didn't really want to do, but that it wasn't really about it.

Saturday in Philly was a lot of fun. We, the team of people who have already re-located to Philly for the church plant, headed to Reading, PA to help judge the Assembly of God's Fine Art's Festival. Or something like that. I was able to judge to short stories, poems, and other creative writing pieces. It was honestly SO MUCH FUN. At one point I popped in to observe one of the puppet shows. When the first puppet popped up he said: "Hi, I'm Jonah." My spirit smiled and I immediately left to go tell my friends about my second Jonah revelation. As I began to tell the story of the Jonah puppet, a kid who was standing there in the group of people informed me that his name was, in fact, Jonah.

I literally laughed out loud. Seriously God, I get it.... but did I?

As the day went on, the high of the Jonah revelation was diminished by a heaviness in my spirit. The oppression was so obvious. Attitudes shifted, and some of us actually became physically ill. There was tension among the team and I went off to bed emotionally exhausted and full of tears.

Whenever something is deeply burdening me, I like to journal about it. That evening I wrote:

     "God I don't want to be here. There is nothing that is easy about Philadelphia or the life I would have here. Philly is a fight... I am not strong enough for this challenge. I miss home. I miss Michigan where life is known and the future looks bright. I have a place to live there, a job, and a purpose there. I love it there...." 

I continued to write on about my dreams for love and relationship here in Ann Arbor. The potential for a spouse and a family; all of which could come from the friendships I've established here. That night I prayed for further confirmation and peace in my spirit; I was not let down.

In spite of having Jonah revealed to me 3 times in 24 hours, I was still looking for confirmation that God was going to take care of me if I moved to Philly for Him. Oh how stubborn we humans tend to be.

Thank God I had other people praying for me in this situation. Sunday morning I woke up not sure what to think. Saturday was a roller coaster and that evening I was to fly home to Michigan. I had hoped for a clear-cut sign; certainly hearing about Jonah all of those times wasn't enough. But as we headed from the Cherry Hill Mall to PHL, something shifted in my spirit. I wasn't ready to leave. Through all the uncertainty and tension, it was Philadelphia that I wanted to see, not Michigan. To top it off, the following Sunday, my sunday school lesson was on Jonah.... The curriculum picked it, not me. Go figure. I get it!

On February 28th I turned in my letter of Intent to WCA to inform them that I would not be returning to teach in the fall. Teaching this year has been phenomenal and I am going to miss my colleagues and students tremendously.

As I go into this next chapter of my life, I am going to need help and there are several ways you can help me. First and foremost is through prayer. I would not be where I am today if it were not for the prayers and support of my Christian family. Second of all, more prayer. Seriously guys, I'm not one to ask for help. I've grown quite accustomed to doing things alone, but God has challenged me to reach out to those that He has brought into my life and ask for help.

Lastly, if it's in your means, I could really use financial support. I need AT LEAST $1,000 to get to Philly and get on my feet. I will be serving the church full-time, and although rent and meals are provided, student loans, insurance, etc. are not. If each person reading this donates $10, that 1k will be raised very quickly. If all 488 of my facebook friends read this AND donate $10, I'll be all set to get started and then some.

There are a few ways to give. You can send me a check direcly (e-mail me at Cherith.Harkness@gmail.com for my address), you can donate straight to the church (www.theblockchurch.org), or you can send a check to the church and mention me in the memo. Sending it this way makes your donation tax-exempt.

Thanks for taking the time to read this lenghty blog post. I hope it helped you better understand where I'm coming from, where I'm headed, and how you can help me get there!